Too Much and Not Enough
Many Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony.
John 4:39 (ESV)
I stared at my empty suitcase. Why was I making this complicated? Just pack some clothes and your Bible. I had signed up for this women’s conference because I craved a deeper spiritual connection and was tired of conversations that never went further than fashion and skincare. But here I was, stuck on whether to pack jeans or a dress and what handbag would be appropriate. Standing there, I realized what was really bothering me—the worry I wouldn’t belong.
What if the women at the conference were meek and mild-mannered? I can be spicy and outspoken. Would I fit in? I might be too much.
Women feeling like we’re too much, too broken is nothing new. In the Gospel of Luke, he tells the story of a woman anointing the feet of Jesus with expensive perfume. A Pharisee accuses her of being too sinful and too wasteful of something so precious. Too much. But Jesus sees her lavish act as one of love and repentance, and he offers her forgiveness. “Therefore, I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much (Luke 7:47 ESV). Jesus says of her, “I tell you the truth, wherever the gospel is preached throughout this world, what she has done will also be told in memory of her” (Mark 14:9 ESV).
At the conference, it turned out, it didn’t matter what I packed, because the focus was not on who I was but who God is. I was able to let down my guard and concentrate on hearing God’s Word and singing praises. It was like giving water to a wilted plant. My soul started to revive.
What if the women at the conference were meek and mild-mannered? I can be spicy and outspoken. Would I fit in? I might be too much.
Women feeling like we’re too much, too broken is nothing new. In the Gospel of Luke, he tells the story of a woman anointing the feet of Jesus with expensive perfume. A Pharisee accuses her of being too sinful and too wasteful of something so precious. Too much. But Jesus sees her lavish act as one of love and repentance, and he offers her forgiveness. “Therefore, I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much (Luke 7:47 ESV). Jesus says of her, “I tell you the truth, wherever the gospel is preached throughout this world, what she has done will also be told in memory of her” (Mark 14:9 ESV).
At the conference, it turned out, it didn’t matter what I packed, because the focus was not on who I was but who God is. I was able to let down my guard and concentrate on hearing God’s Word and singing praises. It was like giving water to a wilted plant. My soul started to revive.
Yet, going deep isn’t easy. (Why does the Holy Spirit always make you cry?) By the final day of the conference, I felt emotionally drained, and doubts returned. These women are so much more mature in their faith. They have a broader understanding of the Bible, you have only an elementary understanding. You will go right back to your superficial thoughts when you leave. You are not holy enough to sustain what you’re feeling now. I went from feeling like I was too much to not enough.
The Bible covers this, too. In John’s gospel, Jesus meets a Samaritan woman at a well—a woman who likely feels she’s not enough, broken and ashamed. Afterall, she is drawing water at the hottest time of day, probably hoping not to encounter anyone. Yet, Jesus offers her living water. She runs back to town, “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Can this be the Christ?” (John 4:29 ESV). Jesus honors her with the opportunity to be the first female evangelist to share the Good News. “Many Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony” (John 4:39 ESV).
In the final moments of the conference, we were invited to take Holy Communion. The speaker took the stage and uttered these words, “Jesus gives HIS body so we can become THE body.”
“Jesus gives HIS body so we can become THE body.”
We all have our own role to play, unique to each of us. Let’s be careful of our inner narratives, comparing ourselves to others and telling ourselves that we’re too much or not enough. Don’t compare. Jesus is enough. He chose you and will use you to share his good news with those around you.
The Bible covers this, too. In John’s gospel, Jesus meets a Samaritan woman at a well—a woman who likely feels she’s not enough, broken and ashamed. Afterall, she is drawing water at the hottest time of day, probably hoping not to encounter anyone. Yet, Jesus offers her living water. She runs back to town, “Come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Can this be the Christ?” (John 4:29 ESV). Jesus honors her with the opportunity to be the first female evangelist to share the Good News. “Many Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony” (John 4:39 ESV).
In the final moments of the conference, we were invited to take Holy Communion. The speaker took the stage and uttered these words, “Jesus gives HIS body so we can become THE body.”
“Jesus gives HIS body so we can become THE body.”
We all have our own role to play, unique to each of us. Let’s be careful of our inner narratives, comparing ourselves to others and telling ourselves that we’re too much or not enough. Don’t compare. Jesus is enough. He chose you and will use you to share his good news with those around you.
PRAYER
God, thank you for loving me so much that you gave your Son for me. Help me to not compare myself to others and remove any self-doubt that keeps me from living as who you created me to be. Let your Word revive my soul because you are enough. Amen.
REFLECT
Within the span of a day, try to notice how many times you compare yourself to others. In what ways has God uniquely created you, and how might you live according to his design for your life?
God, thank you for loving me so much that you gave your Son for me. Help me to not compare myself to others and remove any self-doubt that keeps me from living as who you created me to be. Let your Word revive my soul because you are enough. Amen.
REFLECT
Within the span of a day, try to notice how many times you compare yourself to others. In what ways has God uniquely created you, and how might you live according to his design for your life?
